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   Allsogreat posted on Main Page The Lobby  The young woman who submitted the
tech support message below (about her relationship to her husband ) presumably did it as a joke. Then she got a reply that was way too good to keep to herself. The tech support people's love advice was hilarious and genius!

The query:
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under
Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as: NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and House cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?


The response (that came weeks later out of the blue ):

Dear Desperate,
First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command: I thought you loved me.html and try to download Tears 6.2. Do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta version. Whatever you do, DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Mother-In-Law 1.0 as it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.

In addition, please do not attempt to re-install the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported
applications and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0.

Good Luck
April 6 at 10:14 EST .

   3 people like this.

   FlatCityGirl  Too cute!
April 6 at 10:29 EST .

 1 person like this.

   Texastealady  That is hilarious! Sending to my newly married granddaughter
April 6 at 11:05 EST .

   Flowerladytoo  Too funny!!!
April 9 at 01:13 EST .

   Allsogreat posted on Jokes  Just had to do it???/
   January 16 at 17:20 EST .

   9 people like this.

   Allsogreat posted on Main Page The Lobby  I just saw where a lot of "Anti-Police" products are being sold on ebay and Amazon....when did this become acceptable?
   September 14 at 09:12 EST .

   15 people like this.

   MeiDei  I heard Amazon removed the T-shirts after much ado. Didn't hear about any other items.
September 15 at 11:11 EST .

  4 people like this.

   Allsogreat posted on Main Page The Lobby  A police officer called the station on his radio.
"I have an interesting case here. An old lady shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just mopped."
"Have you arrested the woman?"
"Not yet. The floor's still wet."

   August 14 at 15:52 EST .

   15 people like this.

   Linder  Know the feeling! Smart police officer.
August 15 at 05:09 EST .

  6 people like this.

   Surfhut  My day just started with a good laugh. Thank you!
August 15 at 08:17 EST .

  5 people like this.

   Allsogreat posted on Main Page The Lobby  Brought to you by our Mooslim Government in Washington..
August 2 at 10:37 EST .

   13 people like this.

   Safetydude  The Navy has to bring charges; Captains's Mast for non-judicial(Article-15 )punishment or a General Court Martial. He broke the law, no matter the mitigation.
With those charges in his personnel jacket, regardless of outcome, his career is finished.
August 2 at 21:50 EST .

  10 people like this.

   Allsogreat  I hope your article is correct....I think he broke a "RULE"....not necessarily a "LAW"...there are also rules about the care and safety of those personnel under your command....
August 3 at 08:54 EST .

  10 people like this.

   Safetydude  I can't speak for the Navy but based on my experience in the AF a DoD Directive is 'Law'. And our AFR's were based on those directives.

The DoD doesn't write regulations. A Directive is a basis for each service to write their branch specific regulation.
If you laid AF, Army and Navy Regulations side by side they all reflect what the DoD demands.

The Navy is in a cleft stick; if they choose to not press charges they may be in defiance of a DoDD and their own regulation. If they do charge him they have to bring in a finding of not guilty and possibly expunge all records to save his career.

I agree his action was heroic and DoDD 5210.56 should be rescinded, but in the meantime the Navy has to follow the 'law' otherwise there is no law.

My point was that a career may have been jeopardized because of a heroic act.
If the Navy chooses not to charge him there is no paperwork, all is forgotten, life goes on and he will be remembered as a hero.

I'll remember him as a hero who may have risked more than his career, he may have also risked his life.
August 3 at 20:34 EST .

  9 people like this.

   Lonestar Jack  If he were a Mooslum all charges would be investigated Ad infinitum. Or dropped. Ala Berghdal
August 5 at 17:13 EST .

  10 people like this.

   Safetydude  Read the comment set in quotes in paragraph four.
There is always wiggle room in any 'official' govt. statement.
August 6 at 18:42 EST .

  4 people like this.

   Allsogreat posted on Main Page The Lobby  ACTS 2:38 Conceal Carry & an Intruder.
You gotta love compassionate Christian Seniors.

A woman had just returned to her home from an evening of church services, when she was startled by an intruder.
She caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its valuables and yelled: “Stop! Acts 2:38 !”

(Repent and be Baptized, in the name of Jesus Christ, so that your sins may be forgiven. )

The burglar stopped in his tracks.

The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done.

As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar:
“Why did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture to you.”
“Scripture?” replied the burglar. “She said she had an Ax and Two 38's!”
June 14 at 10:29 EST .

   12 people like this.

   Allsogreat posted on Main Page The Lobby  Marine court-martialed for refusing to remove Bible verse
May 27 at 14:55 EST .

   9 people like this.

   Safetydude  I'm on both sides of this issue.
As Christian, I support her right to exercise her religious freedom and as a retired senior NCO I have to support her Supervisor and her Commanders.
LCpl Sterling had many, many avenues to deal with with this issue. One of them was not to argue with a senior NCO.
Once that starts, in order to preserve the command authority, she was bound to lose. She should have known that since as a LCpl she was in the chain of command.

I think there is more to this story...I think she wanted out and someone gave her bad advise.
I'll bet she thought she would get a 'General Discharge Under Honorable Conditions', not a BCD and she could go on her way.

I'm sure her Commander offered an 'Article 15', Nonjudicial Punishment, which she must have refused and asked for a general Court-Martial.
May 27 at 22:37 EST .

  8 people like this.

   Allsogreat posted on Main Page The Lobby  Had a friend who just went to a CVS in Baltimore and said all that was left was suntan lotion and Father's Day cards.....
May 4 at 12:18 EST .

   13 people like this.

   Belwhatter  Precious.
May 5 at 15:14 EST .

  7 people like this.

   Allsogreat posted on Jokes  A large group of Isis fighters in Iraq are moving down a road when they hear
a voice call from behind a sand dune: "One Marine is better than ten Isis
fighters". The Isis commander quickly orders 10 of his best men over the
dune where a gun-battle breaks out and continues for a few minutes, then

The voice once again calls out: "One Marine is better than one hundred Isis
"S.O.B.s". Furious, the Isis commander sends his next best 100 troops over
the dune and instantly a huge gun fight commences. After 10 minutes of
battle, again silence.

The voice calls out again: "One Marine is better than a thousand Isis
fighters." The enraged Isis commander musters 1000 fighters and sends them
to the other side of the dune. Rifle fire, machine guns, grenades, rockets
and cannon fire ring out as a terrible battle is fought .... Then silence.

Eventually one badly wounded Isis fighter crawls back over the dune and with
his dying words tells his commander, "Don't send any more men... it's a
trap. There's two of them.
February 9 at 14:46 EST .

   21 people like this.

   Allsogreat posted on Main Page The Lobby  I was surprised and very pleased by this article

A French Soldier's View of US Soldiers in Afghanistan
February 8 at 10:12 EST .

   20 people like this.

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